Over the last six months, I’ve had a lot of conversations in my discussion groups and writer groups about how important support systems are. It doesn’t matter what your profession is, or what goals you’re striving to reach, support is necessary.
If I asked you, “Who’s your support system?” Would you say one name, two names, three? A lot more? In my opinion, the number doesn’t really matter. The quality of support is way more meaningful than the quantity. If you have the best, loving, caring, true, honest, unconditional support of only one, that’s better than sporadic, half-ass, maybe sometimes, conditional support of a million.
Creative minds can be difficult. Some of us want to spout out our ideas, and sometimes– uh, lots of times– it’s at the wrong time. How do we turn it off to make sure we don’t annoy those around us? How do we filter? How do we shut the hell up? It’s hard. It hurts. It’s a horrible thing to figure out, and I’m sure there are some who feel they shouldn’t have to “turn off” to please others, and that’s okay. To each their own.
All-in-all, creative minds are hard to tame, but in the last year, I’ve finally learned to just shut up– well, most of the time. I try my damnedest to not talk about what’s rumbling through my head. It’s hard, but I truly work on it. I go to my notebook or computer and let it come out that way. Is it healthy? Is it the best way? The right way? I don’t know. But I’ve learned there are some who don’t want to know what I’m working on, what I’m dealing with, what ideas I have for this story, or that story. In this case, I’ve realized it’s better to be quiet than to express.
However, those who want to be a part of my support system, will listen to me. Those who want to support me will ask me how I’m doing, what’s going on in my life, and they’ll want to know about my stories and ideas. In this case, I share and open up. Yes, once I get going, it’s hard to shut me up, but that’s who I am. Expressing myself is something I enjoy, but I’ve learned who appreciates my passion.
I’ve learned a lot about my creative mind and my creative tendencies– not just in the writing world, but in everything I do. I’ve realized I’m okay with filtering. I’m happy with not stating my opinion or point of view on everything. I’ve learned most people really, honestly don’t care. That being said, I feel my closest support system does care. That’s where the nugget of happiness is. That’s where I’m comfortable and feel loved. It’s where I don’t have to justify what spews out of my mouth, if I go on and on about a character I just made up, or I ramble about a story I have rolling and tumbling in my head. It’s where I’m okay and not judged if I don’t say something just right.
Don’t get me wrong, not everyone in our life has to be everything or *POOF* it’s not a worthy relationship. Each person has their purpose. All I’m saying is it’s good to know who’s unconditional and who’s conditional, that’s all. Conditional isn’t bad as long as you understand it’s just that– conditional.
We all need people who cheerlead us toward our goals and celebrates with us when we reach them. We also need people who’ll pick us up when we stumble and fall. It’s amazing how far an outreached hand can carry us when we feel like a failure. Encouraging words and fully-listening ears are great healers during discouraging times.
As life moves forward, as our dreams and goals are realized, as we go through hard times, and good times, it’s the love and support of others that we hold close to our heart. May we all not only have those people IN our lives, but may we all BE that person to those in our lives.
Love and happiness to you all.
Until next time…