Category Archives: March 2015

Some.

Some will take every chance they can to point your weaknesses, instead of your strengths.

Some want to lower you, so they can appear above you.

Some won’t celebrate your accomplishments, but will definitely relish in your failures.

Some will call you a name, one that’s so far from who you really are, that it proves they don’t know you like you thought they did.

Some won’t reach out to you when you’re hurting and going through a difficult time, but will definitely show up when things are fabulous.

Some never see your tears or hear your breaking heart.

broken

These “some” are the cause for silence and exiting. These “some” need to know you take your shortcomings head-on and are quite aware of every single one of your faults.  Seriously, every single fault is burned in the memory, especially after being pointed out on more than two or three occasions. These “some” need to know you admit to being part of the unraveling. Yep, absolutely. Absofreakinglutely.

Life is too short to feel less-than in any relationship. Keep hold of the good memories and let go of the negatives. But, in doing that, you may have to move on. A broken heart can heal, but the scars may not be strong enough to keep things going.

This is okay. Life changes and people change.

If they are so very exhausted, and they feel so strangled by the friendship/relationship, why should you stay?

Don’t hold onto bitterness. Don’t hold onto anger. Breathe in positivity, and release the negative that’s weighing you down.

Give forgiveness. Accept forgiveness. And, believe it or not, sometimes, the asking and receiving of forgiveness is silent.

Until next time…

Everyday mediation:

Love life. Be Kind. Be genuine. Eliminate the negative, false, and vain. Peace, love, and happiness to all. 

3 Comments

Filed under March 2015

Heart and Character

I saw this in the social media world and I wanted to share it with my blog followers.

10441401_10153428277069523_2584899692869273964_n

Isn’t it true?

Seems like these days people are more obsessed with their face, their body, and their outwardly looks more than how they treat others and who they are on the inside.

We are so much more than what’s on the outside. Whether you have wrinkles, damage, scars, a pooch, extra skin, extra pounds…. so what! If you treat people well… if you greet people with a genuine smile… if you have a good heart, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL! Always remember that.

A good heart and authentic character will carry you beyond what you ever know is possible.

Until next time…

Everyday meditation:

Love life. Be Kind. Be genuine. Eliminate the negative, false, and vain. Peace, love, and happiness to all. 

4 Comments

Filed under March 2015

Simple Can Be Great

One minute: “Oh, I love this.”

Next minute: “Ugh… this is utter crap.”

Three minutes later: “Wait, maybe it’s not too bad.”

Six minutes after that: *Crumbles paper and throws it across the room* OR *Delete… Delete… Delete…*

Every single writer I know has had this moment a few hundred thousand times, if not more. It’s exhausting to question every word we write. It can be excruciating. I tend to pace the floor as I talk out loud (or scream) at my characters, while pulling my hair out at the root.

Pace… pace… pace… scream.

Yes, I know if I chill out, not force it, the words will work themselves out, but of course, it takes me going through the screaming and pacing drama to get me to the other side.

pull hair out

Thankfully, I have random days when it seems all the stars are in alignment, and the rays of writerly-love shine upon me, at the perfect angle, and every word that pours from my fingers is pure gold. Those are the days I do a snoopy dance and sing the love of words loud and proud for everyone to hear.

snoopy

Boom… Boom… Boom… here they come. From a distance, almost as soon as I catch my breath from dancing, I can hear the rumble of their feet. Remember those doubt demons I spoke about in a post a few months ago? They creep up on me and loom overhead like storm clouds.

Then, the trigger–the one thing that sends me spiraling down, down, down, from my high of golden words.

Why did I have to get online and see that post where someone shares their complex, deep, dark, words–the ones that blow my words right out of the water and makes them seem menial and small? Then, I see someone boast about how their writing IS NOT simple and, “how dare someone tell me I write in such a way!”

Here I am, staring at my story in all its simplicity.

Is this such a horrible writing crime? Is simple shameful?

I face-plant the computer keyboard. Now… cue the tears and wails. Well, that’s a little overboard, but you get my drift.

After a few moments (probably more like hours or maybe even a few days) of self-deprecating arguments with myself, I put on my writing armor and fight my way back to the love of my story… my simple, yet engaging, story.

Does a story have to be complex, dark, deep and/or use large intertwined words to be called “fabulous”, “great”, “fantastic”, and all those other phenomenal descriptions?

In my opinion, no. I know there are those who disagree with me and that’s okay. To each their own, right?

I like to read a well-written, simple story. To me, it’s enjoyable. Does that make me less of a reader? Absolutely not! Don’t get me wrong, I also love a well-written, complex story. The key obviously being “well-written”. When done right, simple AND complex, have their place in this large world of words.

If that’s the case, why do I beat myself up for writing simply? Why do I let other people’s complex work stab the innermost, vulnerable part of who I am? Is it because those are the books that seem to get the most press? The most mentions? Or am I just being mean to myself and allowing the doubt demons have their way with me? Could it be plain ol’ insecurity? Yeah, probably all of the above.

I need to remind myself that simple writing doesn’t mean generic, unoriginal, or lacking in depth. Simple can be great. Simple can be big. Simple can reach millions of people and be loved by the same.

Okay, with all of that being said, it’s time for me to make myself perfectly clear:

I am damn proud of the stories I’m working on– I mean super-duper, hold my head high, proud. I love the storylines, the characters, the settings. I refuse to let what I read on social media, or elsewhere, bring me down and make me feel less of a writer because it’s not a “certain way”. I look forward to interacting with the readers who fall in love with the stories and characters just as I’ve written them. They are penned from a genuine heart that thoroughly enjoys the process, even the difficult, disheartening parts.

IMG_9266

I say, let us not put down the simple or the complex. Let’s just all get along and praise the time, the heart, the love, the sweat, and the tears that go into each and every word bound by the spine of authorship.

Until next time…

Everyday meditation:

Love life. Be Kind. Be genuine. Eliminate the negative, false, and vain. Peace, love, and happiness to all. 

10 Comments

Filed under March 2015, Monday Blogs

Sweet Memories and Saying Goodbye

Grief.

It’s a small word. A quick word… yet it holds tons inside its five letters.

Pain, sadness, confusion, heartbreak, sorrow, anguish, loss– it’s definitely a loaded, complex, heavy word.

The feeling of it… the feeling of it… the feeling of it…. How do you put that into words? I don’t know if I can.

As my beloved Nana is nearing her last days, all the feelings of sadness and loss are raw, and right at the surface. The grief of knowing she won’t be there anymore when I step into their home, the one I’ve known all my life, the one that holds many, many, many memories with her, it hurts. That house is Nana and Papa’s house, and always will be, but she won’t be there. That saddens me. I have to remember, that just because her earthly body won’t be there, she will still be there, no matter what.

Memories of my sweet Nana– the wonderful, lovely memories– they will always make me smile, laugh, and yes, cry.

* Her love of the color fuchsia.

* Her always matching her lipstick, blouses, and pants perfectly. I mean, perfectly. It was a talent. Our trips to Hamrick’s were an adventure… trust me!

* Her scrambled eggs. She made THE best scrambled eggs. I have tried and tried and tried for YEARS to get my eggs like hers, but it proves to be impossible.

* Her never-ending quest to collect umbrellas. No matter where we went, she had to buy an umbrella. Yesterday, my mom was going through some drawers in Nana’s dresser, and found a stash of at least ten, small, never-used, still in the packaging, umbrellas. I couldn’t help but laugh.

* Her quick-witted words. She always had a good come back. Just yesterday, as we were surrounding her bed, papa leaned over, gave her a kiss on the lips, and told her “that was the best sugar I’ve had all day”. Even in her sickly state, she mumbled, “It better be.” That’s my nana!!

* Piddling. She could piddle around in her purse for hours. Sometimes, I don’t think she really knew what she was looking for, but she could always pull something out that she had forgotten about. It could be a packet of jelly from Hardee’s or a mint from the fish camp. Heck, if you ever needed a toothpick, it may have taken her ten minutes to find it, but she’d get you a darn toothpick.

* Her making my Christmas nightgowns. Every Christmas Eve, Dena (my angel of a cousin who passed when I was 21) and I would get a nightgown that Nana handmade for us to wear for Santa’s arrival. We’d run to the back bedroom and change into them before leaving nana and papa’s house. That way, when we got home, all we had to do was run straight to bed. Oh, the excitement of putting on those long, warm, gowns… the perfect ending to what was always a fun celebration on Christmas Eve.

*Her hands. Nana always had beautiful, slender, soft hands. And yesterday, I was able to hold and kiss them for the last time.

I hate to talk about her in the past tense already, but all-in-all, her mind and body are already making their transition to the spirit world, where she will gain her wings, and be my angel.

The next few days, weeks, and months will be tough, but knowing she will be out of pain and will no longer suffer from the horrible disease of dementia, will comfort us as a family. And knowing she will always be a part of us–will always have her beautiful handprints on our soul– will keep us smiling at the beautiful memories she will leave behind.

I love you, Nana. I’ll see you again, but until then, please visit me. Please send me a sign you’re there. Heck, feel free to piddle in my purse. I don’t mind. I’ll even put some fuchsia lip stick in there for you.

18 Comments

Filed under March 2015

It’s All You

Here’s a quick thought for your Thursday:

Be careful who you emulate and try your best not to imitate others in your path to fulfillment. That will mar your steps and muddle the awareness of your goals. Riding on the coattails of others will make your journey not truly your own. Know that you are enough and you have everything it takes to make your road to success authentic and genuine.

~A. Weaver

IMG_9033

Have a wonderful day!

Everyday meditation:

Love life. Be Kind. Be genuine. Eliminate the negative, false, and vain. Peace, love, and happiness to all. 

Until next time…

5 Comments

Filed under March 2015

Keeping the Writing Marriage Inspired

As to be expected, whether they’re full of it or lacking in it, writers tweet, facebook, and blog about inspiration often. I know if I were to go back through the posts I’ve written over the years, I’m pretty sure I have one, two, or five on the subject.

Inspiration means everything to a writer. It’s not only what provokes a new story, but it’s also what keeps the passion going for the story we’re in the process of writing or editing.

The last couple of weeks have been a struggle for me. It’s been hard for me to stay focused and inspired with the story I’m currently editing. I know it’s about mindset, about surroundings, about staying in love with the story, about the passion for the characters– all of that. Every single thing affects our inspiration.

It’s normal to get blasé about a story we’ve been writing, working on, editing, changing, fixing, tweaking. I mean, come on, it’s quite a process, and sometimes grueling, to make a story everything we want it to be– everything the characters want it to be. It’s a constant challenge to keep the writing/editing mojo going.

Writing is a marriage between the writer and the characters, and just like any relationship, it requires communication. So, when we feel things going awry–the love is fading–we have to talk to our characters, and even more importantly, we have to listen to them. We may want them to do one thing, but they’re insistent on doing something completely different. Often times, if we listen to their vision, and not our own, the storyline will begin to move along. We’ll see the missing piece of the puzzle that we might have missed if we hadn’t taken the time to communicate with our character(s). Communication is like gold for story-telling.

design (2)

If talking things out doesn’t work, maybe take a step back, let it simmer. This is not only good to do during the writing process, but also during the editing process, especialIy in the first deep edit, where we’re changing, rearranging, and creating more depth to our scenery and characters. It can be frustrating when the pieces and parts aren’t coming together. Sometimes it feels more like work than creation, which can be highly disheartening for a writer. Take a deep breath, set it aside, and let the characters and scenes do their own thing for a little while.

I wouldn’t suggest the next tip for a human marriage, but for a writing marriage, I say go for it– play around with another story! This keeps the creativity flowing while the other story is on a break. You never know, the new story you’re messing around with may teach you something you need to learn about the other story that’s simmering on the side.

My last piece of advice on keeping your writing marriage inspired is to keep all your senses engaged. For example, when I’m writing/editing my holiday stories for the Tinsel Trilogy, and I get ho-hum about how things are going, I light a Balsam Fir candle. I sip on spiced cinnamon hot tea. I listen to Christmas music. I put on a Christmas movie and keep it going in the background. I swear, while working on The Christmas Key last year, I watched Home Alone 1 and 2 no fewer than twenty-five times, plus all the other Christmas movies I have on DVD, saved on my DVR, and on Netflix. I also think there were a few times I turned down the thermostat so I could wrap up in a blanket. It didn’t matter if it was sweltering hot, in the middle of August, I had all this going on inside the house. And, trust me, it got me through. It kept me going.

FullSizeRender

Just like any marriage, sometimes love isn’t enough. We have to work at it. We have to baby it. We have to entice our partner– our characters. We have to change the scenery. And, you never know, you may have to talk a little dirty to it to get it going.

Do what ya gotta do. No matter how silly it may seem to others, if it works, do it. Keep your story going. Stay inspired. It’s worth it– love of the story is always worth it.

Until next time…

Everyday meditation:

Love life. Be Kind. Be genuine. Eliminate the negative, false, and vain. Peace, love, and happiness to all. 

8 Comments

Filed under March 2015